Is A Really Smart Partner A Good Idea?

We all like the idea of a really smart partner. Intelligence has always been something that not only our society has admired but also we as individuals personally admire as well. It gives a person an air of quality, and besides wealth and beauty, is what is commonly sought for in a partner. However unlike wealth and beauty it is a quality that no one is ashamed or embarrassed to admit that they admire or want in a partner, for they can expect no social scorn to be seeking a partner with this quality.

Now why is an intelligent person a sought after partner? Not only do they elevate us, but there are more practical reasons. Intelligent people tend to earn more and are more capable with tasks.

However as desirable an intelligence person would be as a partner, do we stop to think whether or not it would actually be a good idea for us?

In order to answer this question we need to be honest about our own intelligence level and the reasons why we desire an intelligent person. The reality is that it is difficult to live with someone who is less intelligent than us. Therefore we generally seek those with at least the same level of intelligence as we do. Problems can arise when our partner is significantly more intelligent than we are.

There are generally two types of intelligence: academic and social intelligence.

A partner who is way above us on either of those types of intelligence is actually not a very good idea.


Academically Intelligence

Imagine if your partner was someone like Albert Einstein. How would you interact with someone like Einstein? If our partner is far more academically smarter than us then there can be communication difficulties. When they say and discuss things we will have problems understanding and keeping up with them. This leads to us feeling rather inadequate, embarrassed, and we feel it keenly as a shortcoming.

For your partner they will feel frustrated as you don’t understand them and not being able to speak or understand them at their level. They would then have to simplify things for you which is not a good solution as simplification loses at least some depth of meaning and so it doesn’t  allow them to convey everything they want to say.

Then leads to them feel quite lonely and frustrated as they can’t share all their thoughts with you. The danger here is that this loneliness would leave them to being open to others or start looking elsewhere. It is human nature that if that which we learn for comes along, we will be attracted to it and follow it.


Social Intelligence

If your partner is very social intelligent then a similar thing can happen. Here their high level life skills means they are capable of dealing with problems, issues, and generally handling things that life throws at you both. This will make life easier for you and you will obviously enjoy it. However this would also mean that they would end up handling and dealing with most of the problems and matters simply because they are better at it. Now because they are the ones doing most of the work as their skill is much higher than yours they would feel resentful for it.

They would then not have respect for you as you are not capable of taking care of the actions at the same level as theirs. This leads to the same result as that with those who are academically more intelligent, they are open to looking elsewhere and other options besides you.

Conclusion: Someone with roughly the same level of intelligence would be a much better result.

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